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Top 20 sites as of May 1998

"Rankings are based upon aggregation of multiple URLs and / or domain names. All numbers are estimates and are subject to the limitations inherent to survey methodology, such as sample variability, data collection, flaws and nonrespondent bias."

The "Real" XFiles

Those of you that follow the series, know that the two main characters, Scully and Mulder are FBI agents assigned to investigate strange unsolved cases, better known as the X Files. In searching for the real-life X Files, who would have thought the first place to look would be the FBI's own web site? Over the past year, the FBI, through the Freedom of Information Act, has been releasing many of their famous case files. At "The FBI FOIA Electronic Reading Room," you'll find the following compelling categories:

• Famous Persons
  
• Historical Interest
  
• Espionage
  
• Violent Crime
  
• Gangster Era
  
• Unusual Phenomena
  

Do you want to read all about Bonnie and Clyde's last days or learn what the FBI had in John Lennon's file? How about the famous Alcatraz Escape in 1962? Do you want to read the FBI's official files concerning the famous Hinderburg Disaster? Then, close to Terry's and my heart, the "Unusual Phenomena" section. Here you'll find files concerning the Animal Mutilation Project that took place in the 1970's. There are also 1600 pages concerning UFO reports. Lots of summer reading here.

One word of warning. Some of the files are very large and take a while to download. The files range in size from 500 kb to 8,126 kb. All of the files are in PDF format and you will have to have the free Adobe Acrobat Reader installed. To visit "The FBI FOIA Electronic Reading Room," point your browser to:

http://www.fbi.gov/foipa/foipa.htm

You'll have to watch yourself because you could spend hours at the site pouring over the historic documents. The files make very interesting reading, especially when they are put in perspective of the period they were written.

Humor Time

The Joys of Customer Service

After experiencing difficulties with his computer, a poor, incognizant user calls the system maker's technical support line for assistance:

Technician: "Hello. How may I help you today?"

Customer: "There's smoke coming from the power supply on my computer...."

Tech: "Looks like you need a new power supply."

Cust: "No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files."

Tech: "Sir, what you described is a faulty power supply. You need to replace it."

Cust: "No way! Someone told me that I just had to change the system startup files to fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the right command."

For the next ten minutes, in spite of the technician's efforts to explain the problem and its solution, the customer adamantly insists that he is right. So, in frustration, the technician responds:

Tech: "I'm sorry. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there's an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem."

Cust: "I knew it!"

Tech: "Just add the line "LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the CONFIG.SYS file and everything should work fine. Let me know how it goes."

About ten minutes later, the technician receives a call back from the customer."

Cust: "It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking."

Tech: "Well, what version of DOS are you using?"

Cust: "MS-DOS 6.22."

Tech: "Well, that's your problem. That version of DOS doesn't include NOSMOKE. You'll need to contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch. Let me know how it all works out."

After nearly an hour, the phone rings again:

Cust: "I need a new power supply."

Tech: "How did you come to that conclusion?"

Cust: "Well, I called Microsoft and told the technician what you had said, and he started asking me questions about the make of the power supply."

Tech: "And what did he tell you?"

Cust: "He said my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE."

HOW TO SCREW UP AN INTERVIEW

We've all been interviewed for jobs. And, we've all spent most of those interviews thinking about what not to do. Don't bite your nails. Don't fidget. Don't interrupt. Don't belch. If we did any of the don'ts, we knew we'd disqualify ourselves instantly. But some job applicants go light years beyond this. We surveyed top personnel executives of 100 major American corporations and asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants.

The lowlights:

1. "... stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application."

2. "She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to me and the music at the same time."

3. "A balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later, wearing a hairpiece."

4. "... asked to see interviewer's resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate."

5. "... announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fries in the interviewer's office - wiping the ketchup on her sleeve"

6. "Stated that, if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm."

7. "Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions."

8. "When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office."

9. "At the end of the interview, while I stood there dumbstruck, went through my purse, took out a brush, brushed his hair, and left."

10. "... pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a flash picture of me. Said he collected photos of everyone who interviewed him."

11. "Said he wasn't interested because the position paid too much."

12. "While I was on a long-distance phone call, the applicant took out a copy of Penthouse, and looked through the photos only, stopping longest at the centerfold."

13. "During the interview, an alarm clock went off from the candidate's brief case. He took it out, shut it off, apologized and said he had to leave for another interview."

14. "A telephone call came in for the job applicant. It was from his wife. His side of the conversation went like this: "Which company? When do I start? What's the salary?" I said, "I assume you're not interested in conducting the interview any further." He promptly responded, "I am as long as you'll pay me more." "I didn't hire him, but later found out there was no other job offer. It was a scam to get a higher offer."

15. "His attache [case] opened when he picked it up and the contents spilled, revealing ladies' undergarments and assorted makeup and perfume."

16. "Candidate said he really didn't want to get a job, but the unemployment office needed proof that he was looking for one."

17. "... asked who the lovely babe was, pointing to the picture on my desk. When I said it was my wife, he asked if she was home now and wanted my phone number. I called security."

18. "Pointing to a black case he carried into my office, he said that if he was not hired, the bomb would go off. Disbelieving, I began to state why he would never be hired and that I was going to call the police. He then reached down to the case, flipped a switch and ran. No one was injured, but I did need to get a new desk."